


Secret Muse

by SupernaturalPrincess9



Category: Supernatural
Genre: First Kiss, First Love, First Time, M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-04-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 01:24:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3749761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SupernaturalPrincess9/pseuds/SupernaturalPrincess9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Late one night, Dean discovers that Sam writes fan fiction. And that's not the only thing he discovers about his little brother that shakes up his world view and brings his desire for Sam to the surface.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Secrets That You Keep

Dean was finally asleep in his bed. Sam had been waiting for his brother to drop off for quite some time. Sam slowly and quietly got out of his bed, grabbing his laptop and a pillow on the way to the bathroom. Once there, he carefully closed the door so that even the snick of the lock wouldn’t wake Dean. 

Sam threw the pillow on the floor and used it to cushion his butt as he settled in to write. He’d had a story brewing that he’d been dying to get uploaded to his fan fiction account, but Dean was always around – and awake – leaving Sam no time to get the story out of his head. 

He and Dean would be traveling to their next hunt tomorrow so Sam figured he could write tonight and sleep while Dean drove in the morning.

Sam eagerly smiled as he cracked his knuckles and began to type his latest entry in the Twilight section of FanFiction.net. 

_Chapter 6: Protection Detail_

_Edward hugged Bella to him and looked at Jacob over her head. Jacob was lounging on the hood of his souped-up Rabbit. He was shirtless and clearly posing to show off his muscular form. He was looking at Bella, but Edward noted that Jacob was looking at him, too. Edward smirked when he heard Jacob’s thoughts._

_“Does he ever wear a shirt?” Edward asked Bella, rhetorically, before capturing her mouth in a kiss that he drew out, sealing their lips together in much more than just a good-bye kiss. He hoped Jacob was watching the way Bella responded to him._

_As Edward drove away, it occurred to him that he should potentially consider why he kept thinking about how Jacob felt while he was kissing Bella._

_Jacob drove Bella back to the reservation, wondering why Cullen always had to put on a show, getting all handsy and letting his slick red lips linger on Bella’s. Jacob nearly swerved when he realized he was thinking of Edward’s red lips and how they might feel against his own instead of the girl in the passenger seat. He’d dreamt of being with Bella for so long… but lately it was Edward who captured his attention._

Snuggled under his covers, Dean wondered what was taking Sam so long in the bathroom. He’d awoke when Sam had shut the bathroom door behind him, but it had been a long time since that happened. Dean rolled over in his bed and opened one eye. He could see a soft glow beneath the door. Dean sat up to get a better look and then glanced at the table where Sam usually kept his laptop.

It was gone.

So, it appeared that Sam had his laptop in the bathroom with him. Dean tried to figure out why Sam would try to hide what he was doing. 

Option One: He wasn’t trying to hide anything, he was being considerate. Maybe he didn’t want the light from the laptop to disturb Dean’s sleep. With Sammy, that was a real possibility. 

Option Two: Sam was looking at porn. Dean pondered that for a moment. He immediately discarded Option Two based on the fact that he’d never actually seen Sam watching porn on his laptop. 

Option Three: Sam was researching something he didn’t want Dean to know about. 

Of the three options, Dean thought the third one was the most likely.

Dean fluffed up his pillow and stared at the ceiling. What could Sam be researching that he didn’t want Dean to know about? Dean mulled the possibilities over as Sam continued to write.

_After Edward had discovered that another vampire had been poking around Bella’s home, the Cullens gathered at their house in the woods. Edward called Jacob and had him meet them to discuss the recent developments._

_“Jacob, can I talk to you alone?” Edward asked, his amber eyes imploring Jacob to set aside their differences._

_Jacob licked his lips, still thinking about how Edward’s lips might feel against his own, and nodded at Edward before following him into Carlisle’s study._

_“Ok, Bloodsucker. What’s up?” Jacob asked, cocking his eyebrow, giving Edward every ounce of attitude he could muster. He’d been doing every mind trick he knew to try to hide his thoughts but had no idea as to whether or not he’d been successful._

_Edward closed the door behind him and strode over to Jacob, grabbing his head and crashing their lips together. Jacob wrapped his arms around Edward, startled by the coldness of his skin, but immediately overwhelmed with the passion he’d been denying for some time._

_Jacob sucked Edward’s lower lip into his mouth, tracing it with his tongue. Edward growled and deepened their kiss in response. Jacob knew now that beneath the cold exterior and the glittery skin, there was a fire that could burn raging hot if the embers were stoked just right._

_When Edward suddenly grabbed Jacob’s hair, bending his head back and exposing his neck, Jacob tensed._

_“You know I could kill you right now…” Edward whispered hotly next to Jacob’s ear. “I could sink my teeth deep into your throat and drink you down.” Edward smiled wickedly as Jacob whimpered, half in fear, half in lust._

_Jacob did nothing to stop Edward; in fact, he lifted his chin higher, exposing more of his neck to the vampire. Part of him wanted to feel the power of those blunt, white teeth biting into his neck. But what Jacob really wanted was for Edward to pound his rock hard cock into him from behind and then sink his teeth into his neck, claiming him as a wolf mate would._

_Jacob nearly came at the thought._

It was after 4:00 AM when Sam finally shut down his laptop. He felt like he’d written some really solid AU fanfic and was looking forward to the comments from his religious followers. Sam quietly exited the bathroom, tiptoeing past Dean’s bed to lay the laptop on the table before quietly sliding into his bed.

When Dean was certain Sam was sleeping, he snuck out of his bed and grabbed Sam’s laptop on his way to the bathroom. He didn’t know where to start but he had to find out what Sam was doing. 

Dean didn’t think to bring a pillow with him, so it wasn’t long before his ass was hurting from sitting on the hard tiled floor. So far he’d found nothing. He’d looked at the hard drive for documents, but aside from a PDF of their father’s journal, there was nothing.

The web history had been deleted. He wasn’t sure what to do now. Not knowing what Sam was up to was driving him nuts. On a hunch, he decided to check Sam’s Favorites. He went into each sub-folder. In a sub-folder of a sub-folder, he found “fanfiction.net”.

“What the hell is ‘Fan Fiction’?” Dean breathed out, belatedly realizing that he was trying to make no noise at all. _“Shit.”_ he said in his head.

The user name was prefilled but there was no stored password. Dean looked at Sam’s user name. “Team_EdNJake”. Dean knew what “slash” was because Sam had enlightened him about Wincest previously. Dean Girls, Sam Girls and Sam-slash-Dean Girls. 

Dean had said it was ‘just sick’. And he’d meant it then. Maybe.

Not really.

He used to lie to himself about his feelings for Sam. But then Sammy had taken Lucifer into the pit and Dean had tried to live without him. It had to have been around day 200 without Sam when Dean finally admitted that life held no meaning for him without his brother in it. 

And when he let himself follow that thought, it was logical to conclude that he was, at the very least, severely co-dependent on Sam. 

On those few occasions he was truly honest with himself, he knew that he was irrationally entwined with his brother in a way that defied what he’d seen with other people and their siblings, no matter how close those siblings were. 

Dean ran a hand over his face. _“Fuck”_ , he thought. Even when he was trying to be honest with himself, he still tried to obfuscate the truth. He wanted to laugh at how ridiculous he was, but managed to choke it back. 

In his mind he said what needed to be said: _Dean Winchester was in love with his brother._

There. 

There it is. 

That’s it and it’s everything, all at the same time.

Going back to Sam’s login name “Team_EdNJake”… Dean didn’t have Sam’s password. On a hunch, he went to the search function and selected “Writer” and then put in Sam’s login name. That was the last cohesive thought Dean had for a while.

After ten minutes of looking at Sam’s profile and his… fan fics… Dean cleared the browser history and shut the laptop down. He leaned his head back against the wall and thought that, no matter how much time one spent with someone, you could never really know that other person. 

Until you got into their laptop. 

Yep. That would tell you a lot.

For instance, Dean now knew that Sam was a closet Twilight fan. He’d read all of the books (apparently in an e-format of some kind), plus he had also seen the movies, with the exception of the last one. 

Dean had no idea when or where Sam had seen any of those movies, but apparently Eclipse is his favorite and he cannot wait to find the time to see Breaking Dawn 2. 

Sam. the hunter of vampires, loves movies with glittery vampires who befriend humans. 

Who could have seen that coming?

Then Dean remembered: Lenore. 

Sam had been so willing to re-examine everything they knew about vampires based on her word. 

Once put in that context, Dean thought Sam’s infatuation with Twilight made a lot more sense. He wanted to believe monsters could deny their nature. He wanted to believe that he could atone for giving into his own nature when he trusted Ruby and let Lucifer out of the box. 

Dean rubbed his forehead and thought, _“poor Sammy.”_

Another tidbit, which Dean found both interesting and troubling: Sam identified as bisexual, giving himself a 6 on the Kinsey Scale, making him a little more gay than straight. 

Dean leaned his head back against the bathroom wall. When the hell had Sam been sleeping with men? 

Dean felt his face flush with emotion. When he identified it, he realized that thinking about Sam fucking another guy made him irrationally jealous. He shouldn’t care this much about Sam’s sex life.

Unless he was, you know… in love with his brother, for example.

Dean had never once seen Sam express any interest in men. He’d never seen him look at a man with desire. He’d never seen him leave a bar with one. 

In fact, the closest he’d ever seen Sam get to a man was with him when they shared one of their “oh-good-you’re-back-from-the-dead” hugs. 

And when he’d sometimes put his head in Dean’s lap in the car. 

Or when he’d sling his arm around Dean if he’d had a little too much to drink, usually placing a soft kiss at Dean’s temple…

Dean shook his head as he adjusted his boxers so they wouldn’t strangle his hardening cock. Jesus… this was 8 different kinds of fucked up.

Dean rose slowly, working the kinks out of his muscles. 

He slowly opened the door and gently placed Sam’s laptop on the table where he’d left it. Exhausted, Dean slid into bed. His last thought was, _“I need to read some of Sam’s stories…”_


	2. The Fever, Getting Higher

Sam and Dean were both sluggish the next morning. They’d slept in until 10:00 AM, leaving themselves only 30 minutes before check out. 

“Dibs on the shower!” Dean shouted as he headed to the bathroom. Before he shut the door, he stuck his head out. “Hey, Sammy… you could always come shower with me. Betchya that’d save us time!” 

Dean threw his brother a saucy wink before shutting the door.

Sam stood with his duffel bag hanging off his hand, forgotten. He closed his eyes against the thought of actually showering with his brother. 

His naked brother with rivulets of water streaming down his torso, sliding lower toward the soft patch of hair… 

“Jesus…” Sam breathed out as he shuddered with desire.

Sam concentrated on packing his things, willing his cock to behave; not that it ever listened to him.

Dean jerked himself off quickly in the shower. He hadn’t expected Sam to join him, but he sure was jacking off to the image of a naked and wet Sam up against a wall with Dean’s tongue teasing the tip of his… 

“Fuck…” Dean moaned as he came all over his hand.

Sam caught up on his sleep in the car, which helped Dean stay awake not at all. After five or so hours of driving, Dean decided that it would be dangerous for him to continue so he found the nearest motel and got them a room. 

Dean rapped on Sam’s passenger window, waking him up. 

“C’mon Sammy. We both need some sleep.” he said through the closed window. Sam looked around in confusion, noting it was still daylight and that they’d only been driving for a little over five hours. It wasn’t like Dean to cut their journey short like this.

Sam unfolded himself from the car. Dean was digging their stuff out of the trunk. 

“What’s going on, Dean? Why did you stop?” Sam asked while he rubbed at his eyes, which were puffy from a lack of sleep.

Dean looked up at Sam and that’s when Sam noted the dark circles underneath his brother’s eyes. 

“Tired, Sammy. Didn’t sleep well last night.” Dean gave Sam a small smile as he extended his hand.

Sam nodded and grabbed his duffel out of Dean’s hand. If he accidently let his fingers slide over Dean’s in the exchange, he wasn’t going to comment on it.

Sam walked toward the room as Dean closed his eyes and sighed. The skin on the back of his fingers tingled where Sam’s fingers had slid over them as he had taken his duffel from Dean. 

Dean realized that he had to get himself under control. Just because his brother was into men didn’t mean that he would be into his brother. 

In fact, Dean lamented to himself, it was nearly impossible that Sam would ever be interested in him like that.

Grabbing the rest of his stuff, Dean followed Sam to the room and let them in with the key. 

Dean immediately fell face first on the bed closest to the door and went right to the sleep. Sam got a beer out of their cooler and sat at the table, continuing his story from the previous night. He was pleased to have some time to write during the day. 

He could sleep a little later.

_Jacob and Edward broke apart. They had to be careful with the whole family and Bella just on the other side of the door._

_“I want more…” Jacob whispered into Edward’s mouth as the intensity of their kiss slowly waned._

_Edward lightly bit Jacob’s earlobe. “I know, I can hear your thoughts, remember? After we kill Victoria, we can go off… under the guise of hunting or something…”_

_Jacob leaned back and looked into the surprisingly gentle eyes returning his gaze. “I don’t think I can wait that long… we at least need to talk, Edward, about what all this means.”_

_Edward turned and looked off into the distance, trying desperately to avoid hearing Jacob’s thoughts. He already knew what he would find there._

_“I know, ok? But not now. Now, we have to go out there and make them believe we’ve come to some kind of truce and that we’re going to work together. Keeping Bella safe has to be our focus. Once we know she is, we can figure the rest of this out.”_

_Edward turned back to Jacob and brought him into a firm hug, still fascinated by the huge temperature difference between their bodies. “We’ll sort it all out later, ok?”_

_Jacob nodded and broke away. “Yeah… so, for now, what’s the plan? One of us takes Bella away?” Jacob focused his attention on Bella in order to keep Edward from hearing his churning thoughts._

_Edward stared at his shoes. He didn’t know the right answer. “Maybe. Let’s go back out and talk to the others.”_

_Jacob walked to him and kissed him softly. “Whatever you say, Bloodsucker.” Jacob smiled to take the sting out of the insult._

_“Dog.” Edward whispered back as he kissed Jacob one last time._

Sam leaned back and stretched. 

He really needed to get into the meat of this story… get some hot sex in there. 

At the thought of hot sex his eyes traveled to where Dean was still lay, face down on the bed. His shirt had drifted up, exposing his lower back and side. Sam let his eyes travel over the dip at the base of his brother’s spine and then over the delicious mound of his ass.

Sam felt his cock spring to life. His brother’s ass was amazing: firm, rounded muscle in perfect proportion to the rest of his body. Sam let himself imagine slipping his brother’s jeans off and then sliding in behind him… opening him with gentle fingers… maybe his tongue…

 _Holy shit._

Sam adjusted his jeans as he stood. He needed to get out of the room before he did something crazy. Picking the room key up off the table, Sam exited the room to take a walk.

As soon as Dean heard the door close, he popped out of the bed and went to Sam’s laptop. He hadn’t even logged out of it so Dean had full access to his current work. He read it and thought _“this really needs some hot sex scenes in it…”_

Opening another browser, Dean went to Sam’s profile and began looking at Sam’s work. One of his stories was called “Forbidden Love”. He thought that sounded interesting and so he clicked the link. 

The story wasn’t long, about 4,000 words, but the topic was fascinating. 

At least to Dean. 

It was the tale about two brothers – apparently Jasper and Emmitt – who were related to… Edward, maybe? Well, looked like they all had the same vampire sire. Anyway, Jasper and Emmitt were in love with one another and they’d run off into the forest, away from their family for wild sexual escapades. 

Dean was astounded to note that he had to look some terms up. 

_“What the hell is ‘frottage’?”_

When Dean looked that up, his cock got so hard so quickly he thought it was going to split his zipper open. 

And when he read the scene in which Jasper took his time, rimming Emmitt thoroughly to prep him for his cock… Dean shut down the browser he’d opened and went directly into the bathroom to jerk off in the shower. 

All he could think about as he came was that these stories came out of his little brother’s imagination.

Sam was back from… wherever he went… when Dean finished his shower. Dean walked into the room with a towel slung low around his waist, using another towel to dry his hair.

Dean noticed the quick scan of Sam’s eyes up and down his body and filed that away for later contemplation. 

“Hey. You wanna go get some dinner?” Dean asked with a smile.

Sam nodded. “Yeah… let me just do a couple of things and then we can go.”

Dean was feeling a little bit bold, so as he took his boxers out of his duffel, he let his towel drop to the floor, treating Sam to a clear view of his ass. 

Dean smirked a little to himself as he bent down to step into his boxers.

Sam’s eyes were fixated on the curves and the fullness of Dean’s ass. 

Why the hell was Dean just bending over like that? 

Sam had to turn away and adjust himself. The baser instincts in him wanted him to turn back, walk over behind Dean… and just ravage him right there. 

That was twice today that Dean’s ass had made Sam want to ravage him.

Instead of doing what he really wanted to do, Sam went into the bathroom and set about brushing his teeth. 

He was going to need the shower later, not because he was dirty… well, not physically anyway.

Dean was disappointed that Sam didn’t stick around for more of his little show. 

Maybe his original assessment – that Sam would never be into him like that – was a sound one, even though he wrote about brothers getting it on. 

If only he’d had more time to read Sam’s stories…

They found a diner not far from the motel and ate in companionable silence. 

Dean could tell when Sam was going to reach for the salt, so he automatically reached for it and handed it to Sam, their fingers making contact briefly. Neither man moved to break the silence. 

Dean paid their bill as he tossed the keys to Sam, who drove them back to the motel. 

“Gonna do some research.” Sam mumbled as he made his way to his lap top once they got back in the room. 

Dean grunted in response as he sat on his bed, flipping through the channels on the TV.

Sam only spent a few minutes on his laptop before stating, “Gonna take a shower.”

Dean waved in acknowledgement without looking back at Sam. He didn’t want to seem too interested. As soon as he heard the shower curtain rustle though, he went right to the laptop, popping it open and pulling up a browser.

He re-read the Forbidden Love story about Jasper and Emmitt. 

Dean thought the story was blazing hot. All those incredibly well described erotic scenes coming from his little brother’s head amazed Dean. What bothered him though, was that he didn’t know how Sam actually knew about any of this.

Suddenly he had an idea. 

Dean created an account. He decided on the screen name TravelinMan to pay homage to his nomadic lifestyle. He didn’t want to pick anything too close to him because he didn’t want Sam to know it was him behind the screen name.

Pulling up Forbidden Love, Dean left a comment for Sam. 

Sam was completely unaware of Dean’s shenanigans in the main room. He was too busy trying to stifle his moans as he jerked himself off in the shower. He just kept thinking about Dean’s ass… firm muscles, smooth skin… and then when he bent over, his cheeks spreading just enough to give Sam a partial view of puckered flesh…

Remembering that was enough to make Sam come. He panted as the aftershocks ran through him. He knew this whole thing was futile: the ogling of his brother, the hidden desire, jerking off to thoughts of his brother’s touch, but he couldn’t stop himself from wanting it all. 

Dean was a pussy hound. He’d slept with enough women to prove that. There’d be no way he’d ever be into dudes, let alone his very own brother.

Sam sighed as he slowly dried himself off. 

He had to find a way to let go of his fantasies about his brother. 

At least that’s what he told himself in the light of day. 

In the dark of night, when he would occasionally admit to himself what was real, he knew love when he felt it. 

And he loved Dean. Beyond reason. Beyond logic.

He was, in Bella’s words, completely and irrevocably in love with him. His very own brother.

Sam wasn’t aware of any way to let go of that.

Sam sighed as he finished in the bathroom, wrapping a towel around his waist before he walked into the main room. 

Dean was still watching TV and appeared to be completely uninterested in whatever Sam was up to. 

Sam had to walk right in front of him to get to his bed. He didn’t look at Dean as he passed, but he could feel Dean’s eyes on him. Sam could always feel when Dean’s eyes were on him, like they had some kind of weird… soul connection or something.

Thinking of Dean’s actions after his shower, Sam decided to treat Dean to a little show of his own. Not that Dean would be interested, but maybe a few seconds of nudity would become routine and he could see his brother’s ass every… 

_“Oh shit!”_ Sam thought as his cock started to come to life.

Sam grabbed his boxers and dropped the towel in one simultaneous motion. He bent over to step into the boxers, going just a little slower than was strictly necessary. He grabbed his t-shirt and sweats and then turned toward his bed. 

His half hard cock was completely recognizable in his boxers. 

He looked at Dean, who had definitely noticed that Sam was packing a little heat, and then held his brother’s gaze as he nonchalantly pulled on his sweats and t-shirt.

Sam went to his laptop and didn’t provide Dean with an explanation. 

Dean looked like he couldn’t be less interested in what Sam was doing so Sam risked looking at his FanFiction account while he was still up. He responded to comments and then wiped the browser history and logged out of his account.

Meanwhile, Dean was one-hundred percent focused on the TV, trying to regulate his breathing as he willed his cock to settle down. Seeing Sammy half hard and staring at him… It had taken everything in Dean to maintain a neutral face and to then feign indifference while inside his desire for his brother was screaming for him to go to Sam, to take him in his arms, to kiss him breathless and… Dean couldn’t think about that anymore without risking insanity.

Sam walked back to his bed and slid between the sheets. “G’night Dean.”

Dean looked away from the Maltese Falcon and smiled at Sam. 

“Night, Sammy. Sweet dreams.” Dean threw him a wink and Sam gave him a quizzical look in response. 

Dean went back to the Maltese Falcon, his lips moving silently as he mouthed the on-screen dialogue. Sam plumped up his pillow, turned away from the TV and settled in for the night. He had some sleep to catch up on. 

His last thoughts before sleep took him were of TravelinMan’s question and his response.

When Dean was certain that Sam was sleeping deeply, he took the laptop into the bathroom and logged into his FanFiction account, going directly to the comments section on Sam’s story.

_TravelinMan : This story is really hot. You’re kind of cheating though, aren’t you? I mean, Jasper and Emmitt aren’t really brothers. Would you write a story about two brothers who were blood related doing the same things?_

_Team_EdNJake : Glad you found the story to be hot. :) That’s what I was going for! In the canon of Twilight, Emmitt and Jasper are brothers, they refer to one another that way, but you’re right – the reader still knows they’re not related by human-born blood – just Carlisle’s vampire blood. So, to your question, I don’t think if they were actually related I would have written the story any differently. Thanks for reading!_

Dean let out a shaky breath. 

So, it appeared that Sam wouldn’t have had an issue with the brotherly blood bond. That was interesting. Of course, Dean knew that didn’t mean Sam’s acceptance of a relationship like that in fan fiction would translate to real life. 

Writing fiction was just that – writing fiction. 

And besides, Dean had no clue as to how Sam really felt about him. 

He needed to ask another question.

Dean thought for a bit and then began typing.

When he was done, Dean put the laptop back where Sam had left it and then returned to the bathroom. He turned on the water in the sink and began to stroke himself. 

He imagined sucking Sam’s full bottom lip into his mouth, teasing it with his tongue. He imagined Sam kissing him hungrily and begging for Dean to touch him. He came to the image of Sam riding his cock, his head thrown back and his fingers entwined with Dean’s as he came all over both of them.

It took Dean a while to recover from his orgasm. It had been intense and he nearly cried with want as he lay down in the bed across from Sam’s. 

Sam was on his back with his head angled toward Dean. In the soft light of the waning moon, Sam looked innocent and young. The light played with the angular planes of his face and cast areas of shadow and light. 

Dean thought his brother was beautiful. He wanted so much to go over and kneel down in front of Sam and gently trace his sweet features with his fingers.

Dean flipped over onto his other side and sighed.

In the other bed, Sam had felt Dean’s eyes on him. 

The intensity of Dean’s focus had been enough to bring him out of a deep sleep. He nearly gave into the urge to open his eyes several times but ultimately had resisted. When he heard Dean shift and sigh, Sam opened his eyes and looked at his brother’s back. 

He would give anything to know what Dean was thinking. 

He knew, however, he wouldn’t be courageous enough to ask.

Sam shut his eyes and slid into a restless sleep filled with dreams of his brother’s eyes on him.


	3. Take a Chance on Me

When Sam heard Dean hit the shower in the morning, he rolled out of bed and took the opportunity to check his FanFiction account. TravelinMan had left him another comment.

_TravelinMan : Do you think if Jasper and Emmitt were related by blood, they would do the things you’ve written? Could you ever see two actual brothers doing the types of things you’ve described in this story? I understand this is fiction but I guess I’m wondering what your muse is when you’re writing stories like this?_

Sam read the user’s question several times. The internet was interesting in that people can pretend to be whatever they wish. As Sam read the question for a fourth time, he wondered if the user was just trolling his account or if he was genuinely interested. 

Sam looked at the user’s profile. TravelinMan’s profile was pretty sparse, but there was enough information there for Sam to gain a little insight. With a smile on his face, Sam decided he’d send the user a Private Message.

_Team_EdNJake : Hey – thought I would send you a private message instead of answering your questions in a public forum. Regarding your first question about whether or not the Jasper and Emmitt in my story would let a blood relation stop them, I don’t think they would. I think if they had a love that profound, they wouldn’t let anyone or anything stop them from realizing it. So in that sense, yes, I could see two actual brothers sharing that type of relationship if their love was that… transcendent. In terms of a muse, I am a romantic at heart. In my real life, I have to move around a lot – like you maybe? So I’m never in one place long enough to develop a relationship that allows me to explore the intimacy that comes with an established love. My secret muse loves me only in my dreams. Are you interested in this topic specifically or are you mainly interested in my story?_

Sam logged out and waited for Dean to finish in the bathroom.

Dean left the bathroom with his towel slung low for a second day in a row. He winked at Sam as he passed the table. “Bathroom’s all yours, princess.”

Sam threw Dean his patented bitch face and went into the bathroom. 

Dean quickly changed into his clothes and booted up Sam’s laptop. He signed onto his FanFiction account as was startled to see that Sam had sent him a private message.

As Dean read what Sam had written he felt a little guilty about the subterfuge. He told himself it was for the greater good as a way to rationalize tricking his brother. He was happy that Sam thought a relationship between two brothers would be something he could see occurring if the love were epic enough. It broke Dean’s heart a little to know that Sam wasn’t able to love as he wanted because of the way they lived their lives.

Dean thought for a couple of minutes and then sent a response.

It was two days before Sam had a chance to check his FanFiction account. He’d been thinking about TravelinMan and was dying to hear from him. As Dean napped, trying to catch up on sleep after their two-day hunt for a rogue werewolf in Tennessee, Sam logged in.

_TravelinMan : I’m sorry that you haven’t been able to explore a relationship like you’ve wanted to. That sounds lonely. Hopefully you have someone to share other aspects of your life with. I guess you could say that I’m interested in your story, but I’m also interested in the topic. _

_Your story resonated with me because I have a brother who’s very special to me. We have always been very close but lately I’ve noticed that my feelings for him have changed. I guess that’s not entirely accurate… all of the feelings I’ve always had for him are the same, but there’s something layered over the top now, if that makes sense. I notice him in a way I didn’t before. I think he’s beautiful – and I feel funny saying that – but it’s true. Every instinct in me tells me to touch him… to love him. But I’m afraid._

_I’m afraid that he doesn’t love me and want me the same way. I’m afraid that if I say anything to him about how I feel, I’ll destroy our relationship, potentially forever. I’m afraid that he does feel the same way, I don’t deserve his love._

_I just don’t know what to do. It seems so wrong but… that doesn’t stop me from wanting it, you know? Anyway, your story helped me work through some of what I was feeling, so thanks for that. And thanks for listening._

_PS – you’re a very good writer. You could do it professionally if you wanted to! :)_

Sam read TravelinMan’s response and felt something twist in his gut. His heart really went out to the user because he could empathize with what he was feeling. The man’s feelings hit so close to home with Sam, so he quickly typed out his response.

_Team_EdNJake : I understand what you’re saying. The truth is that I have a brother, too. I spend a lot of time with him and over the last year or so I’ve developed romantic feelings for him. I mean… I think I’m in love with him. No… I know, without a doubt, I’m in love with him. But he’s strictly into chicks and also a bit whorish. Haha. :-\ To be honest, watching him go off with women is often very hard for me to deal with. I really just want him all to myself. _

_I don’t judge him, though. He’s sacrificed so much, and he’s always been amazing to me. We live kind of a thankless life so finding comfort where you can is about the best we can do. He’s incredibly good looking and he never has to work hard to land a girl, no matter where we are. I first realized my feelings for him had changed dramatically when I started getting jealous of his conquests. It bothers me when he sleeps with all those women, but I smile and keep my chin up. I have to hide what I feel, you know?_

_Is there any chance your brother feels the same way you do? Maybe there’s some way you could test the waters to see if he responds? Something mostly neutral so you could play it off as nothing if he isn’t interested? If so, you should try it. Life is short, right?_

_Thanks for complimenting my writing. I do a lot of research and annotations about that research so my writing is usually related to my work. This is something just for me. My little secret. :)_

_Maybe you’ve guessed this already, but my brother is my secret muse. In my imagination, he lets me love him without limits. Because that’s how I want to love him. I want to give him everything inside me. He already owns my heart._

_I don’t think he ever would let anyone love him like that, though. Not even me. He’s afraid… using all of his energy to protect his heart, always putting on a brave face, keeping his emotions at bay. I just wish he’d let love in – even if it wasn’t with me. Is that crazy?_

Sam logged out and lay down on his bed. Dean was breathing deeply in his sleep mere feet away. Sam wanted to go to him. Instead, he laced his fingers over his stomach and wondered if anything would ever come of his feelings for Dean. He was afraid that he’d have to spend the rest of his life suppressing the love he felt. 

It was depressing so Sam decided he wouldn’t dwell on it. At least for now.

Sam soon dozed and then sank into a deep sleep as exhaustion overtook him.

When Dean woke up a couple of hours later, he wanted to check his FanFiction account but wasn’t sure how long Sam had been sleeping. He didn’t want to get caught. They were just starting to talk about some critical things in their private messages. 

Dean compromised and just read Sam’s response but didn’t respond himself. 

When he was done reading Sam’s response, he went into the bathroom and turned on the water. He cried softly for a while. The way Sam saw him wasn’t wrong, but it was sad and Dean didn’t want to be the person who didn’t let love in. Especially not when someone as beautiful and amazing as Sam wanted to give him his heart.

Dean had no idea why Sam felt that way about him, but he knew if he didn’t do something to change things up, he might miss out on it forever. So, he considered a plan that would bring them closer, at whatever pace Sam wanted. 

From this point going forward, for Dean there would be no more women, no more flirting and no more impenetrable walls. He couldn’t change the walls overnight, but he could lower them and try very hard to trust Sam with his heart in the way that he’d always trusted Sam with his life.


	4. Been Savin' All My Love

With his plan formulated, Dean decided to wake Sam up for dinner. He went over to Sam’s bed and sat on the edge. Sam mumbled a protest and then quieted. No time like the present to put his plan into play. Dean reached up and gently brushed Sam’s bangs off his forehead. 

Sam’s hair was so soft… Dean loved it. And he loved that Sam had grown it out. The chestnut color and the subtle sun-kissed highlights were amazing.

Dean carded his fingers through Sam’s hair, whispering, “Sammy…” Sam nuzzled his head against Dean’s hand, causing him to pause. His fingers were still in Sam’s hair, so he used his thumb to gently stroke Sam’s forehead. “Sammy…”

“Mmmm… “ Sam said as answer. Dean ran his thumb across Sam’s forehead again.

“C’mon Sammy… wake up, babe.” Dean whispered. He reddened when he realized that he’d called Sam _“babe”_. Hopefully Sam was still asleep.

Sam didn’t open his eyes, but he was awake now and he had quite a few things going through his mind. 

First, Dean had just called him “babe”. Not one other time in Sam’s entire life had Dean ever called him babe. 

Second, Dean’s fingers were in his hair and they’d been softly scratching his scalp. He’d let Dean do that all day if he wanted to. It felt fantastic. 

Third, Dean had just gently stroked his forehead – not once – but twice. Sam was confused and more turned on than he could ever remember being.

He let his eyes flutter open and he found Dean’s eyes staring at him. 

“Hey…” Sam said softly. “What’s going on?”

Dean smiled and slowly removed his hand from Sam’s head. 

“Just thought we’d go grab some dinner. You wanna go?” Dean gave Sam an open smile, letting his love for his brother put a gentle sparkle in his eyes.

Sam had wanted to beg off from dinner tonight. It’d been a while since he added to his Edward/Jacob love story and he didn’t want to disappoint his readers. But that was before Dean gently touched him to wake him up. 

Now Sam just really wanted to be with his brother.

Sam reached over and patted Dean’s knee. “Yeah… let me just wash my face and brush my teeth and I’ll be ready.”

Dean smiled as he patted Sam’s hand back. “Sounds good, Sammy.”

Dean waited for Sam and then they set off in search of a diner. Sam noted that, while the waitress was very much Dean’s type, Dean didn’t use his considerable charms on her at all. In fact, he seemed very focused on… Sam. 

He listened to Sam talk about his recent research into alphas and certain incantations that they could use for protection. He signaled to the waitress when Sam’s soda needed a refill. Sam was unsure of what to think about all the attention, but he found Dean’s actions to be something that made him warm inside.

After dinner, Sam thought that he’d try to return some of Dean’s kind treatment of him. 

“Do you wanna find a bar, have a few drinks? Maybe you’ll get lucky.” Sam added a teasing smile, hoping inside that Dean, in fact, wouldn’t get lucky.

When Dean reached over and put his hand on Sam’s shoulder, he was a little confused. 

When Dean said, “How ‘bout we just pick up some ice cold beer and find a movie to watch back at the motel?”, Sam couldn’t have been more surprised. 

It had been a while since Dean had picked up a chick. It wasn’t like him to decline an evening in a bar.

“Sure… Dean… that sounds great.” Sam smiled at his brother. Dean gently squeezed Sam’s shoulder and released it.

“Let’s go.” Dean slid into the Impala and 15 minutes later, they were back in the motel. They sat on Sam’s bed and found “Rear Window” on a local station.

“I always loved Jimmy Stewart.” Sam said. “… well, and Grace Kelly, too, of course. But Jimmy Stewart is awesome in this movie… never leaving his room. It’s amazing.”

Dean handed Sam a beer with a smile. “Agree. This movie is great.”

Sam noticed that Dean kept stretching his neck as they watched the movie. After the seventh or eighth time, Sam looked at Dean and asked, “You ok, Dean?”

Dean reached up and rubbed his neck. “Think I slept wrong, Sammy. Neck is stiff.”

Sam looked at Dean for a moment, weighing what he would do next. Decision made, he said, “Why don’t you sit in front of me and I’ll rub it for you.”

Dean smiled and shook his head. “Nah… that’s not necessary, Sammy. I’ll be ok.”

Sam just nodded, not wanting to force the issue. He was disappointed but he hid that behind a small smile. As Dean continued to fuss with his neck, Sam resisted the urge to offer again. 

After another 15 minutes, Dean said in a soft voice. “Hey… Sammy? Is that offer still good?”

Sam nodded as he put his beer on the nightstand. He grabbed 2 pillows and put them between his legs, patting the bedspread between his knees. “Sit here and lean back on the pillows. I’ll fix it.”

Dean did as Sam asked, laying back so that his head was resting on Sam’s chest. Dean nearly groaned as Sam’s cool finger tips started to work into the muscles in his neck.

Sam found Dean’s skin to be so soft under his fingers. He wanted to lightly run his fingers over Dean’s neck to make him shiver, but that obviously wasn’t a good idea. So he used a medium pressure and long, firm strokes to begin loosening the muscles in Dean’s neck.

Dean loved Sam’s touch. The nerve endings in his skin tingled every time Sam slid his fingers over them. As Sam rubbed up the back of Dean’s neck and then into his hair, Dean had to suppress a groan of appreciation. Surely heaven was Sam’s graceful fingers massaging his scalp. Dean, of course, had already been to heaven… but that was beside the point. Sam’s fingers were magical.

Sam used the tips of his fingers to rub Dean’s forehead. He placed his fingers together in the center of Dean’s forehead and then pulled his hands back to his temples, using a constant pressure, which did actually cause Dean to moan. 

Dean’s eyes were closed and he kept them that way, a little embarrassed by his inability to reign in his pleasure at Sam’s touch.

Sam then massaged down the sides of Dean’s face, moving his fingers in little circles as he relaxed Dean’s jaw muscles. Sam’s touch was incredible and Dean could feel his whole body relaxing. Sam moved his hands back to Dean’s neck and firmly, using long strokes, rubbed Dean’s trapezius muscles. 

Dean was starting to feel like jello.

When Sam moved his hands to the front of Dean’s neck and rubbed down into his pectoral muscles, Dean was powerless to stop him. In fact, Dean was hoping that Sam would go big or go home. He was ready to feel those gargantuan, yet strangely gentle, hands all over him.

“Sammy…” Dean whispered. 

Sam paused his motions. “Do you want me to stop?”

Dean reached up and took Sam’s hand in his. He brought it to his lips and softly kissed the back of Sam’s hand. “Nope, Sammy, I don’t want you to stop. Feels good. Really good.” 

Dean placed Sam’s hand back on his neck and used his thumb to softly caress it, before dropping his hand back onto the bed.

Emboldened by Dean’s actions, Sam used his fingers to explore Dean’s face. He ran the backs of his fingers down the sides of Dean’s face in a soft caress. He used his thumbs to stroke across Dean’s cheekbones, gently massaging the muscles going into his jaw. He traced Dean’s eyebrows with his finger tips and then he laid his palms on Dean’s cheeks, cradling his face. 

Sam smiled down as Dean nuzzled into his hands. When Dean turned his head and kissed the palm of Sam’s right hand, Sam caught himself before he could moan out loud. Watching those amazing lips place a kiss so sweetly in his hand touched Sam to his core.

Dean decided that Sam shouldn’t get all of the touching fun to himself so he reached his hands over to Sam’s legs and ran them down to his feet, pulling up the bottoms of Sam’s jeans so that he could touch the soft skin around his ankles. 

Dean used his thumbs and fingers to caress Sam’s skin. He used light touches that caused Sam to get goose bumps as Dean’s fingers passed to and fro.

Sam’s cock was painfully hard by this point and what he really wanted to do was to lay down next to Dean and kiss him… hopefully leading to other things. 

Instead, Sam used his index fingers to slowly trace the perfect bow of Dean’s upper lip; and then he ran his thumbs over his full bottom lip. When Dean turned his face and captured Sam’s thumb with his teeth, Sam stopped breathing.

When Dean used his tongue to stroke the pad of Sam’s thumb, Sam couldn’t hold back a low moan.

When Dean sucked Sam’s thumb into his mouth and boldly stroked it with his tongue, Sam was lost.

“Jesus… Dean…” Sam said, closing his eyes as an overwhelming desire washed over him.

“Sammy…” Dean said in a low voice, tinged with need.

Sam looked down at Dean, directly into the upside down eyes looking back at him. The two men held one another’s gaze, searching for that which was buried deep within them both. 

Sam focused on his love for Dean and he let that emotion play across his face. He wanted Dean to see it; to trust in it.

Sam felt Dean shudder as he got Sam’s silent message. Dean suddenly sat up and Sam was terrified that he’d shown too much. That he’d let Dean see too much of the love he had for him.

Sam didn’t reach for Dean. He didn’t need to. Dean had swung his legs off the bed and had grabbed Sam’s hand, pulling him to his feet. Without a word, Dean drew Sam into a fierce hug. They held one another, their breathing synchronized, until Dean finally leaned back after several moments, breaking the connection.

Dean placed his hand along Sam’s cheek, using his thumb to lightly stroke Sam’s cheek. At the same time, Dean ran his other hand down to Sam’s ass and used it to push their hips together. Both men gasped as their hard cocks pressed against one another. 

Sam bit his lower lip between his teeth, more turned on than he’d ever been in his whole life. This was Dean’s show at this point, so he waited for Dean to make his move.

“Sammy…” Dean breathed out. “You’re so beautiful to me. Do you know that?” Dean leaned in and kissed Sam’s cheek, letting his lips linger. “You make me so hot… turn me on so much…” Dean whispered as he kissed his way down Sam’s throat.

Dean brought his head up and looked into Sam’s eyes again, framing his face with both of his hands. “But it’s so much more than that, Sammy. While I want you… so much… this isn’t about that.” 

Dean paused before whispering. “I love you, Sam.”

Dean slowly rose up and claimed Sam’s lips with his own in a soft kiss full of sweetness and love. Sam wrapped his arms around Dean, holding him tightly against him. He needed that connection to Dean to keep himself from crumbling to the floor. 

Dean threaded his fingers through Sam’s hair and held his head so he could deepen their kiss.

Dean plundered Sam’s mouth with his lips and tongue, and while he deepened the kiss, he didn’t speed it up. His nips and licks and strokes were slow, sensuous, wet… hot. They more than hinted at the need, want, desire and passion lingering below the surface.

They lost themselves in their kiss, allowing their hands to roam over one another’s bodies, pulling each other close, feeling one another’s heat. Sam moaned and Dean responded in kind. Their kisses became more urgent; rougher, possessive. Their desire was evident with every touch and they both, in many ways, felt like they were losing their minds.

Dean kissed his way along Sam’s jaw and down his neck, where he buried his face. “Sammy… I want you.” he murmured, his lips skimming across the soft skin of Sam’s throat as he spoke. “Do you want me? Do you want this?”

Sam leaned back and tilted Dean’s face up so that they could regard one another. “God yes, Dean… of course I do.” Sam whispered. He paused before adding, “I’m so in love with you, Dean… you’re all I want.”

Dean’s eyes flared with passion. He grabbed Sam and spun him around, pushing him back onto the bed. Dean threw himself down on top of Sam, holding his face and kissing him urgently. “You’re all I want, too, Sammy.” Dean gasped out as he ground his hips into Sam’s. “Do you feel how much I want you, Sammy?” 

Dean growled as he bit Sam’s earlobe between his teeth. “Do you feel how hard you make my cock, Sammy?” Dean licked down the side of Sam’s neck, biting the muscle beneath his skin.

Sam groaned. “Oh god… Dean…”

Dean kissed Sam with a fiery passion, unable to stop talking as he did it. It wasn’t like him, but he decided he was going to roll with it. “Sammy… I wanna be inside you. I want to feel you wrapped around my cock as I pound into you.”

Sam moaned. “Yes… Jesus yes… please, Dean… I need you.”

“I want you to be mine, Sammy.” Dean continued talking, his voice rough with passion. “No one else gets to have you like this. Just me.” Dean worked Sam’s shirt off and ran his hands over the silky smooth flesh covering Sam’s well-developed muscles. “God… you’re so beautiful, Sammy…”

Sam moaned when he saw the raw want in Dean’s eyes. He leaned up and ripped Dean’s shirt off of him and then pulled him back down on top of him, needing to feel their naked flesh together. Sam pulled Dean into a hungry kiss, wrapping his arms and legs around his brother, trying to get him as close as possible.

“Feels so good, Dean…” Sam moaned into his mouth. “You feel so good.” Sam slid his hands down the back of Dean’s jeans and boxers, grabbing his ass to pull him closer, setting a rhythm he hoped would be repeated without clothes soon.

Dean bit down into Sam’s shoulder. “Sammy…” he gasped. “You have to stop grinding against me like that or this show’s gonna be over before it really starts…”

Sam flipped Dean over onto his back and took his hands, pinning them up above his head. He kissed Dean ferociously. “So…?” Sam sucked Dean’s bottom lip into his mouth and bit it lightly with his teeth. “This is the first time, right? Not the last. We’ve got nothin’ but time, Dean.” 

Sam kissed Dean softly and whispered, “Unless you only want to do this once?”

Dean moaned. “God, no… Sammy… not just once… never just once.” 

Sam straddled Dean’s thighs and worked to undo his jeans. Dean watched every move with hungry eyes that devoured Sam. 

Sam’s hands shook as he moved to slide Dean’s jeans and boxers off. He took his own off and then slid his body up Dean’s, slick skin sliding over slick skin until their lips met and their cocks rubbed together.

Sam kissed across Dean’s cheek, moving his mouth to Dean’s ear. “I want you, Dean. Inside me. Please… I’m begging you.” Sam’s voice was low and husky and Dean felt every word travel through him, straight to his straining cock, causing him to shiver with need.

Dean wrapped his arms around Sam and rolled him onto his back. He gave him a hard kiss and whispered, “Stay here, Sammy. Be right back.”

Dean dug around in his duffel and found his lube. He ran back to the bed and jumped in with Sam, covering his face with kisses. Sam laughed and hugged him close to escape the ticklish torment. They held each other for a minute or two and then Sam laid back and looked up at Dean.

“Need you.” Sam whispered. Sam used his eyes to tell Dean exactly how much he did need him. Dean groaned and leaned down, kissing Sam deeply.

“I love you so fucking much, Sammy…” Dean whispered as he broke their kiss. “I’ve wanted you like this for so long…”

“Me, too, Dean… “ Sam whispered as he looked at the lube in Dean’s hand meaningfully.

Message received, Dean uncapped the lube and coated his fingers, looking at Sam. “Um… I’ve… well… I’ve never done this, Sam… so I’m going on instinct here. Can you, um… give me any guidance? Suggestions?”

Sam smiled and cupped Dean’s cheek with his hand. “I’ve never done this either, Dean. From… uh… what I’ve read, you need to… prep me… and it looks like you’re planning to…” Sam let out a shaky breath. “There are some things I’ve read about… that I think are probably… more advanced? Yeah… some things we could try in the future.” Sam was blushing furiously.

Dean kissed Sam softly. “You’re fucking adorable, Sammy. Jesus… everything little thing you do… so sweet and… just you.” Dean kept kissing Sam as he used his fingers to open his brother up.

Dean kissed Sam slowly as his fingers worked inside his brother. Dean could barely concentrate because the feeling of the slick, satiny space inside Sam was driving him insane. He couldn’t wait to slide himself deep inside him. He knew he was going to lose his mind… he just wanted to make sure that Sam loved the experience, too.

“So soft…” Dean murmured against Sam’s lips.

“Wha…?” Sam gasped.

Dean brought his lips to Sam’s shoulder and kissed him gently. “You’re so soft inside, Sammy…” he whispered. “So… fucking soft… I can’t wait to feel you wrapped around me.”

Dean’s words had Sam grinding himself against Dean’s hand, begging for his touch. Dean wanted to shout from the joy of it and cry at the sweetness of his brother needing him so much. Dean didn’t know much about the geography of things, but when his fingers pressed against a certain spot, Sam cried out and shook with want. Dean, intrigued by Sam’s response, focused on that spot until Sam was panting.

“Dean… oh god… please… inside me… need you now… please…” Sam gasped as tears rolled down his cheeks.

Dean withdrew his fingers as he kissed Sam’s tears away. “Need you, Sammy… can’t wait to love you… can’t wait to be inside you…” Dean’s mouth didn’t stop devouring Sam’s as he rolled on a condom and slicked himself up before moving between Sam’s legs.

Dean broke the kiss and looked at Sam. His brother had a sheen of sweat across his forehead, his hair was disheveled, his lips red and swollen from their kissing… he looked completely debauched and Dean nearly came just from seeing his little brother that way.

Just one thing was wrong with the picture: Sam’s eyes were closed.

“Sammy…” Dean whispered urgently. “Look at me, please...”

Sam opened his eyes. Dean took in their desperation, the desire and knew that Sam saw the same reflected back to him. Dean kissed him softly. “I need you to look at me, Sammy, as I slide into you. I need to see what you feel… and I want you to see me, too…”

Sam nodded and locked gazes with Dean. Dean shivered under the intensity of the emotions pouring out of both of them. Sam reached up and framed Dean’s face with his hands. “Please…” was all he said.

Dean looked into his brother’s eyes as he slowly slid himself into Sam. The initial resistance caused Sam’s eyelids to flutter, but he kept looking into Dean’s eyes as Dean continued to slowly slide his cock deeper and deeper into his brother. 

Dean could feel the soft walls surrounding him despite the condom and he could feel Sam’s love for him pouring out of his brother in waves. Dean’s tears fell onto Sam’s cheeks before he was fully buried inside his brother.

Sam gently wiped Dean’s tears and Dean leaned down to kiss Sam’s away. “Love you, Sammy…”

“Love you, Dean…” Sam choked out, past the lump in his throat.

They locked gazes again as Dean began to move. Sam moved his hands from Dean’s face to wrap them around him, pulling him down so their foreheads touched. They didn’t look away from one another as Dean increased the speed and force of his strokes. 

They tried to maintain their eye contact as Sam began to buck against Dean, attempting to take more of him in, but when Sam let out a strangled yell and came all over both of them, Dean closed his eyes and dropped his head to Sam’s shoulder as he exploded inside him.

“Oh god… Dean… oh god...” Sam moaned. “I… I…” and then he shuddered, too overcome with emotion to even complete a sentence. Dean held him close, murmuring words of love.

“I love you, too, Sammy… I know… I can’t believe… that was… I…” Dean had no words. He rolled onto his back, pulling Sam with him, snuggling him close. Sam rested his head on Dean’s shoulder and held his hand tightly in his own. 

No words were needed. They had both been there and they knew what happened. It had been amazing and beautiful and intense and the only thing either of them had ever really wanted.

Before they went to sleep, Sam needed to get something off his chest. “Dean?”

Dean kissed Sam’s forehead. “What, Sammy?”

“I have a confession.” Sam said with a sheepish look on his face.

Dean chuckled, “Yeah? What’s that?”

“I knew… um… shit. I knew you were TravelinMan.” Sam waited for Dean’s response.

Dean was stunned. He’d been so tricky – or so he thought. “Aww fuck… Sammy. How did you know?”

Sam leaned his head back and kissed Dean’s cheek. “IP address… the website tracks them and TravelinMan’s was the same as mine – consistently.” Sam smiled. “I forgive you for your privacy violation.”

Dean rolled his eyes and pulled Sam close, murmuring into his mouth as they kissed. “Yeah? Well I plan to violate your privacy a lot, Sammy. Like… every day I’m going to violate your privacy…”

Sam laughed. “Dean… it’s only a violation if it’s not wanted. You inside me? I will want that always.”

Dean stroked Sam’s cheek with his fingers. “I love you so much, Sammy.”

Sam smiled and laid his head back on Dean’s shoulder. “I love you, Dean.”

“Sammy?”

“Hmmm….” Sam no longer had energy to form words.

“I have a confession, too.” Dean whispered.

Sam looked at Dean sleepily. “What’s that?”

Dean smiled at him. “My neck? It didn’t really hurt.”

They laughed into their kiss.


	5. Be Everything That You Need

_Edward and Jacob scouted for a good camp site, high up in the mountains. They came upon a clearing which was sheltered by trees._

_“What do you think?” Jacob asked. Edward already knew what he thought. Damn him._

_Edward laughed and pulled Jacob into his arms. “I agree, this is a good spot. Let’s try it out, shall we?”_

_The two men kissed one another hungrily, letting their hands roam as they would. Jacob ground himself against the hardness of Edward’s body. As a vampire, his whole body was solid, unbreakable. But Jacob could definitely feel that one part of him was harder than the rest._

_Edward spun Jacob around and pulled his off shorts. “I’m going to fuck you up against this tree, Dog.” he growled out._

_Jacob pressed his ass back into Edward’s hips. “What the fuck are you waiting for, Bloodsucker?”_

_Edward reached into his pocket and grabbed his lube, freeing his cock as his did so. He could hear and feel the need rolling off of Jacob and it was driving him crazy. There was something to be said about being able to hear people’s thoughts. Especially when you were planning to fuck the shit out of them up against a tree._

_Edward slicked himself up and moved in behind Jacob. “I’m not waiting for anything, Dog.”_

_Jacob moaned and pressed backward. “You know what I want. I’m thinking about it loud enough… so do it already.”_

_Edward pushed Jacob up against the tree and slid…_

Sam was trying to finish his fan fiction about Edward and Jacob, but having Dean standing behind him, reading over his shoulder was a distraction. Well, if all Dean were doing was reading, it wouldn’t be that bad. But Dean was running his hands over Sam’s body and kissing his neck, whispering dirty things in Sam’s ear. 

Those things were definitely distracting.

Dean nipped Sam’s shoulder. “I think Edward should rim Jacob right there… get him good with his tongue and then take him…” Dean purred in Sam’s ear.

Sam shivered. “Yeah? You think that’s better than just sliding right into him?”

Dean kissed his way up Sam’s neck, “Oh yeah… if Jacob’s anything like you, a good rimming will drive him out of his mind. He’ll be all wet and open…”

Sam moaned and let his head fall back onto Dean’s shoulder. Dean took the opportunity to kiss him. Dean teased and licked Sam’s lips. “Want you, Sammy…” he whispered.

Sam stood quickly, shutting down his laptop as he rose, and pulled Dean against him. “Jesus, Dean… you drive me crazy!”

Dean walked backward to the bed, pulling Sam with him. “Yeah? Well, you do the same to me so I guess that makes us even.”

Story abandoned, Sam and Dean spent hours sharing a love that would last a lifetime. Sam’s readers were left bereft when no new chapters of his story were forthcoming. Sam didn’t care, however. Sam was determined to try everything he’d ever had characters do in his stories. 

He would do them all with Dean. 

Sam knew that when one’s fantasy materializes in real life, he no longer needs to imagine it… he can live it.

And Sam did just that.


End file.
